Fuck x 20 , AKA glass half full takes a day off before my head explodes.
15 Comments Published by katitude on Monday, May 12, 2008 at 2:32 p.m..
Fuck defective alarm clocks.
Fuck drivers who pull out of their driveway without looking to the right. On the other hand, a big yay for good brakes.
Fuck people who give you the finger even when they're in the wrong.
Fuck the Blue Screen of Death.
Fuck the stupid @#&% at reception who keeps installing LimeWire to download music and spyware. And no, I'm not going to fix it again, call the tech guy and wait two days 'til he gets here. And no, I don't care that you can't do your work and you're inconvenienced. It now officially has an SEP field around it as far as I'm concerned.
Fuck the person who has been "sick" seven Mondays of the last twelve, causing me to lose my Monday prep period as I cover her class. Funny how she's never ill any other day of the week.
Fuck students who think I don't see the eye roll.
Fuck people who break in and steal technology from schools.
Fuck parents who think they can tell me what method of transportation to use. "My little Susie may be traumatised if you get in an accident on your motorcycle". AYFKM?
Fuck people who never do a backup, then complain to me when their data is lost.
Fuck people who come home, grab the remote and change the channel to a documentary, right in the middle of a movie I was watching. And then looks at me all innocent like and says "oh, were you watching that?" when I object.
Fuck a fingernail broken below the quick.
Fuck rain when they said it would be clearing.
Fuck Timothy's for their inability to know the difference between a double espresso long and a Cafe Americano.
Fuck whoever stole my new stainless steel water bottle.
Fuck Firefox updates that wipe your preferences.
Fuck officious parking lot attendants who think that the way to job satisfaction is to be bitchy to customers.
Fuck being mother-less on Mother's Day.
DAMMIT! Fuck Blue Screen of Death. Again.
Fuck new clothes that are clearly labeled as bing machine wash- and dry-able, and yet clearly aren't.
Edit: and one more. Fuck feeling like a fool.
Fuck drivers who pull out of their driveway without looking to the right. On the other hand, a big yay for good brakes.
Fuck people who give you the finger even when they're in the wrong.
Fuck the Blue Screen of Death.
Fuck the stupid @#&% at reception who keeps installing LimeWire to download music and spyware. And no, I'm not going to fix it again, call the tech guy and wait two days 'til he gets here. And no, I don't care that you can't do your work and you're inconvenienced. It now officially has an SEP field around it as far as I'm concerned.
Fuck the person who has been "sick" seven Mondays of the last twelve, causing me to lose my Monday prep period as I cover her class. Funny how she's never ill any other day of the week.
Fuck students who think I don't see the eye roll.
Fuck people who break in and steal technology from schools.
Fuck parents who think they can tell me what method of transportation to use. "My little Susie may be traumatised if you get in an accident on your motorcycle". AYFKM?
Fuck people who never do a backup, then complain to me when their data is lost.
Fuck people who come home, grab the remote and change the channel to a documentary, right in the middle of a movie I was watching. And then looks at me all innocent like and says "oh, were you watching that?" when I object.
Fuck a fingernail broken below the quick.
Fuck rain when they said it would be clearing.
Fuck Timothy's for their inability to know the difference between a double espresso long and a Cafe Americano.
Fuck whoever stole my new stainless steel water bottle.
Fuck Firefox updates that wipe your preferences.
Fuck officious parking lot attendants who think that the way to job satisfaction is to be bitchy to customers.
Fuck being mother-less on Mother's Day.
DAMMIT! Fuck Blue Screen of Death. Again.
Fuck new clothes that are clearly labeled as bing machine wash- and dry-able, and yet clearly aren't.
Edit: and one more. Fuck feeling like a fool.
Fuckin' A Fuck!
Let's invent a cocktail for kat in the comments. Hereby dubbed the "Fuckem"
It would have to be strong, and have a kick, but needs to be drinkable, but a little bitter.
2 parts Gin or Vodka
1 part fucking Lime juice
Dash of Ango-fucking-stura bitters
Shake the fuck out of it with ice, be sure to infuse anger and hate into it (as opposed to love). Strain into martini glass.
Throw in a fucking twist of lime peel if you fucking feel like it.
Empty the glass, because somedays the glass is empty, no halfway about it.
I'd suggest gin over vodka. Sugar or simple syrup could be added for more sweetness if you're not feeling all that sour. Similarly, lime juice could be reduced to 1/2 part.
*NOTE - I have never made the above and have no idea if it's any good. Although it's really a limier gimlet with bitters instead of triple sec, and gimlets are good.
I'm good with this . . . it only pays to be little Mary Sunshine once in a while . . . at least when you use the "f" bomb a lot, it makes my day seem brighter!
Uhh, did something go wrong, Kat?
Fuck you!
JUST KIDDING!!!!...it does clear the mind though. I like saying "Fuckin' fuckity fucker" every once in a while at the top of my lungs. Works for me!
Fuck Waffles.. no really, he needs it. *pats kitty.. sorry your having a bad month. Liked the fuck list though.
Is this all backlash from that "glass is half full" garbage?
Aye,fuck all that for a game of soldiers! Great post Kat.
SEP, heh, heh, heh...
wow. i approve this post!
I'm reminded of a scene from A Christmas Story...
Mother: All right. Now, are you ready to tell me where you heard that word?
Ralphie as Adult: [narrating] Now, I had heard that word at least ten times a day from my old man. He worked in profanity the way other artists might work in oils or clay. It was his true medium; a master. But, I chickened out and said the first name that came to mind.
Ralphie: Schwartz!
I find myself in the presence of artistic greatness!
Regards,
cheer_dad
How's this grab ya?
One fucking glass that's half fucking empty for every two or three fucking glass half fucking full posts?
It might help you feel a little more fucking balanced!
Seriously: good post. A little venting is a great way to deal with life's 'variance'...
I see you've installed new vents. I hope they are working!
So I'm guessing the fucking experiment is over. Welcome back, Kat!
Ummmmm - yes - I agree!