An open letter....

This is to all the players out there and their unwanted comments/advice.

If you feel compelled write a note to me in the chat window that goes something like "I can't believe you blah blah blah with blah blah blah!" or "what kind of a stupid fish would play that", here's a tip...keep it to yourself. Do you think that just because I'm a woman, I'm going to put up with your crap? Or is it because you can hide behind the nice anonymity of the internet and be a total wanker without reprisals?

Especially if you're typing after your lame-ass all-in pre-flop with Q4 off suit gets cracked by a flush. My flush. Yeah I rivered it, but pre-flop I still had the better hand. Funny how you missed THAT statistic. Loser.

And here's all the things I want to say to you, but can't or won't (two reasons, 1) mum always said poor losers should be humoured..if you agitate them they just won't go away and 2) I don't need a chat warning). These are in no particular order:

- you play your game, I'll play mine.
- there's more to poker than what you read in a BOOK, and after a hundred thousand hands, sometimes you just know.
- I'm a woman.....and when I get a strong blast of womans intuition I run with it. Sometimes it's wrong, but not as often as you might think.
- honestly, it's a THREE DOLLAR SnG, not the freakin' WPT.
- here's a quaarter, buy a clue.
- never underestimate the bored.
- poor losers can leave now.
- go to and look up the meaning of sportsmanship, then try and practise it.
- why don't you take your whiney sad self back to mommy so she can dry your tears.
- FRO&DCB (Fuck Right Off and Don't Come Back).
- Bite me, loser.

Poker is what it is...a game of odds, of juggling statistics, of a certain degree of randomness. The cards fall where the cards fall. You can try and predict it with odds, but kids, even a 1000:1 shot is likely to hit 5 times in 5000 plays. There's always the ONE TIME. ALWAYS. Don't blame the site. Don't blame the software. Don't blame the dealer. Don't blame your opponent. File it under shit happens and move on.

There's a reason why they call it gambling you know. And BTW, as a refresher, gambling is defined as:

- To bet on an uncertain outcome, as of a contest.
- To play a game of chance for stakes.
- To take a risk in the hope of gaining an advantage or a benefit.
- To engage in reckless or hazardous behavior.

If it was a sure thing, poker wouldn't be nearly as much fun.

2 Responses to “An open letter....”

  1. # Blogger Garthmeister J.

    Consider "FRO&DCB" stolen.

    Mind you, if the person is a complete fish I may need to change that to "FROBBBI" - "Fuck Right Off But Buy Back In".  

  2. # Blogger katitude

    FROBBBI...I like that...consider taht one stolen, *grin. I sense a new addition to the poker blogger lexicon, lol.

    And the chat police will never know. Purrrfect!  

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