Fighting the imposter

It is estimated that 70% of high achievers feel like imposters, certain that the present level of achievement does not result from true ability and they will be found out or others will discover the fraud they really are. The Imposter Complex is doubting and discrediting your abilities and achievements. Are you really good or have you just fooled everyone? Sometimes we agree with a person’s compliments but deep inside we deny it to ourselves.
~ Jan D'Arcy

Hoyazo left an interesting comment to my last post that's really made me think. Basically, he said he's not buying my "I'm not very good at poker and am going to get slapped down soon by people far, far better than me" crap anymore.

So why am I still buying it? I've been told lately that my game has improved dramatically, and while I may sort-of-kind-of think they're right, I don't believe. And it's that lack of belief and confidence that is crippling during tournaments. I've got shake this before Vegas in July, or I am dead meat.


On to last night, the Mookie Big O tourney - don't ask me how it happened but I won! That's two in a row....I'm shocked. I'm happy, but I'm shocked. And in the back of my head is that little voice that says "Lucky, that's week they'll find out how badly you SUCK".

Many thanks again to Mookie for setting these up...I ahve so much fun, if only to see if I can outlast SirF yet again (I'm now at 6 for 6, a stat that gives me no end of pleasure *grin).

Come to PokerStars next Wednesday..the more the merrier!!!!

11 Responses to “Fighting the imposter”

  1. # Blogger L'artiste

    Well, winning two 20+ players tournaments in a row is no fluke. That's really not an easy thing to do.

    Better get used to it, I think you're a natural.  

  2. # Blogger mookie99

    Great job last are on fire !  

  3. # Blogger SirFWALGMan

    Dont worry little girl, I got you back.. come watch me play in the 1 million this weekend.. heh. As a matter of fact I might win the whole thing just to spite you.  

  4. # Blogger Hammer Player a.k.a Hoyazo

    Yeah Kat nice job again last night. But drop the act, it is we who are now afraid when we see you at our table in these blogger-sponsored events. You obviously have improved dramatically to win two of these tournaments in a row. Even if last night was on a sick and wrong suckout. :)  

  5. # Blogger katitude

    lol...Hoyazo, your math is off...I counted no less than three sick and wrong suckouts on my part. I'd make a saaaaad face here, because suckouts are wrong. But secretly I'm happy that for ONCE I wasn't on the receiving end of said suckouts.  

  6. # Blogger SirFWALGMan

    oh and btw, yes you have improved, and yes you should always and can always improve more.  

  7. # Blogger BrainMc

    Kat, understand how you feel. I had a tremendous 6 weeks with WWDN in Feb/March. 2 wins (1 against the largest field) and 1 second. I really think mine were beginner's luck and being an unknown. Now that others know how I play, they have adjusted accordingly. I can tell, because after my second win, I have been knocked out very early. I got knocked 1st last week and early this week. I think alot of my final tables earlier was because I wasn't playing "correctly." By that I mean as I read more of the blogs, I realize I was playing hands I shouldn't be and that messed up my confidence. It made me feel like a fraud and now I am easily pushed off of hands to aggressive players.

    You are playing against a group of players that have a wide array of tools and notes on everybody, so don't doubt your ability. You are continuing to do well, you are for real and you scare the crap out of me when you're at my table. I will take my own advice if I start doing better showings at future blogger events. I wish you continued success and I may try next week when I can stay up past my bedtime.  

  8. # Blogger drewspop

    Congrats again Kat! You=rock, I=suck.  

  9. # Blogger Jules

    Well, from the first moment you picked up a pair of kings at Rama, I suspected that this was going to happen and that the day wasn't far off where I would be afraid to have you at my table! Congrats just start believing you are as good as you are please!  

  10. # Blogger jjok


  11. # Blogger Guin

    Congrats on the big win... again.

    I will do what I can to show up this week to take away the crown.

    On the idea that we don't believe we are as good as we say we are... so true. But I have found that noticing that you can still improve is usually the first step in actually getting better.  

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